new beginning

my desire to blog is high but the ability is low. I busy with life and kids. This is my attempt to have more focus on getting my life in order and not just letting my life order me. 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NLT) says : This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! As spring is here and I ponder what I think God would have for me in this life I realize that I need to be more purposeful. I don't think that I am out of God's plan for me but I do think that he has more for me. With that being said here are my goals for having a more God honoring life.
1. Early quiet time this is not easy with a 1 and 2 year old but I need to make it a priority.
2. Pray when I am overwhelmed and stressed easy to just react to situations with out thinking about it. And there are lots of "situations" here!
3. daily show love to my dh
4. read to the little ones more
5. time to talk with oldest dd
6. pray daily for all my kids

Sounds easy enough..........hopefully I will be able to accomplish it all on a daily basis.

anniversary

I haven't blogged much lately! If you can imagine I have been busy (2 babies can keep me very busy and it is not easy to type with one hand). This past week we celebrated our anniversary. I have been so busy and so emotional lately that I haven't done a very good job of honoring my husband. In fact I have not honored him at all. So this week we had some time where we reconnected and I was reminded what I love about him.

Here is my short list on what I love about my husband.
1. He love me like Christ. My childhood was not pleasant and I have a hard time with the love of a father. God has blessed me with a husband that loves me with a true love.

2. He is honest. I know that what he says is true.

3. He is a man of integrity. He loves God and always strives to do the right thing.

4. He is a loving father. He often takes over for me when I am at the end of my patience. Last night he spent about an hour getting the 1 1/2 year old to stay in bed.

5. He prays for me. What a blessing it is to me to hear my husband pray over the little things that are going on in my life (and the big).

6. He provides for his family. I can't remember when he last missed a day of work. He gets up every morning and works hard every day without fail.

7. He never gets upset with me when every thing is not done. (there are days when having 2 little ones makes it impossible to get every thing done :-))

8. He encourages me to spend time with friends and get out.

9. He cares for others. He helps when needed and is always ready to listen.

10. When I need him he is there for me. Last year was a hard year and he never complained about having to do so much when I wasn't able.

11. He writes me letters instead of giving me cards. (although he does that some times)

12. He got me mint meltaways, 2 books and flowers (plus the hand written love letter) for our anniversary. All of my favorite things! So my last thing would be that he knows what I like.

I thanks God for blessing me with such a wonderful husband. I know that I don't deserve him. MJ I love you! Even when I have a hard time showing you!!

Although I am memorizing Psalm 1 with my daughter I felt that God was leading me to do something on my own so I am joining with Beth at Power of Your Love to memorize this verse:

I am the LORD, and there is no other; besides Me there is no God: I will gird you, though you have not known Me.....Isaiah 45:5 (NASB)

Since I am trying to focus on the names of God I would try to break this verse down. I look up LORD which means Jehovah ("I AM", The One Who is The Self- Existent One). God never changes. His promises never fail. When I am faithless, He is faithful. (info taken from the Rose Publishing Names Of God chart). Since I really don't totally understand what it means to gird I had to look that up too. :-0
gird  /gɜrd/ Spelled Pronunciation [gurd]
–verb (used with object), gird⋅ed or girt, gird⋅ing.
1. to encircle or bind with a belt or band.
2. to surround; enclose; hem in.
3. to prepare (oneself) for action: He girded himself for the trial ahead.
4. to provide, equip, or invest, as with power or strength.

I love the thought of God surrounding me. I recently memorized Psalm 139 and there is a part that says that God will both precede and follow me. But when I read this verse I think that it means more to prepare for action. To power and strengthen. So today I pray that God will strengthen me and prepare me for his work.

"Soooo... there is this TAG: going around in Blogville, and I'm it! Yea, I love it!"
Thank you "Soooo... there is this TAG: going around in Blogville, and I'm it! Yea, I love it!"
Thank you Laurie for thinking of me! (Please visit her blog by clicking on her name.)

Here's the rule.I tell you seven things about me that you wouldn't know.Then...I tag 7 fellow bloggers to share 7 things we wouldn't know about them.

I am not very good at listing things about myself! So hopefully this goes well.



1. I like to smell (sounds strange I know). But it helps me create a mental image so you will often see me smelling my children. Just trying to capture that sweet baby smell. (besides when they stink ;-))

2. I love to gather ideas but I have a hard time implementing them.

3. I am very introverted. Although God is working on me there are still times when I have a hard time talking to people. Thats why I like spending time with my family and reading. :-)

4. I next to never buy anything for myself.......preferring to buy for my kids or husband. (unless its books)

5. my favorite season is fall. Just the thought of going to the apple orchard makes me happy.

6. I hate having my picture taken :-) but I regret not having pictures of me at the hospital with the babies.

7. I am not a crier. It takes a lot to make me cry comes! It must be from years of holding it all in.

OK so here are my picks
Deb at One Single Minute
Beth at I am Heading Toward my Destiny
godsown at My Journey
Sonya at Truth 4 the Journey
Peggy at The Power of Your Love

I know that I don't have 7 but duty calls so I will have to try to add more later!

Thankful Thursday

Today I am thankful for:

1. That my girls are finally not sick. It feels like we have had a sick one for months.

2. I am excited and thankful that we are able to have a mini-day vacation. Another way that I am enjoying my husband working only 4 days a week.

3. I am thankful for Robins! Whenever I see them I am reminded that it is finally spring. At this time of year emotionally I really need spring.

4. I am thankful that my son and I have been getting along well the past couple of days. I continue to pray that we will have a good relationship and I would be able to show him the love of Christ.

5. My husband! Most day I am not thankful enough for him but I am blessed to have him. He a loving father, husband and brother in Christ.

19 years and a flashback

There was a time in my life when I never wanted to share my "testimony" because of all that I have done wrong and all the wrong that has been done to me. I think that it is one area where God has really been changing me. To go from a fear of what others may think to a fear (healthy fear) of what my Lord may think. 1990 was a census year, I was 17(soon to be 18)years old and had my first baby on this day (3/23). I have been trying to look back and see God in my life during that time. It is hard but I know that He was there.
I was homeless (at least thats what was checked on the census) living at a roach motel. My home life before was bad my dad and step-mom were using serious drugs daily. No one ever slept and my dad had to let me boyfriend move in (mostly for protection). I think that I wanted to be "good" and I would have loved school but when there is partying all night long it is hard to sleep, which makes it hard to go to school.
Many things transpired to make me leave in my 5 month of pregnancy. In the beginning we went from place to place. Where ever we could find to sleep. Finally ending up at a hotel with weekly rates and a small kitchen.
My boyfriend was way to young (althought he was older than me) and immature to handle having a pregnant girlfriend much less a baby. I was alone a lot of the time while he went out and played with his friends. I am sure all of this contributed to my codependency problem.
March 23 I was working (on month before my due date) when my water broke! I was so scared I had no idea what I was going to do. My boss gave me a ride to the hospital and I was left to have a baby. Things went fast once they hooked me up to the pec drip. I was only in labor 49 minutes. Through most of it I was blessed with a nurse that cared (which I was more attentive but I have no idea what her name is). Which was a good thing since my boyfriend left thinking that he has enough time to go out and celebrate with his buddies(he did manage to make it back just minutes before Z was born).
My life totally changed when I first held Z. He was so little (5lbs 3oz) and so cute. I wanted so much more for us! This was one of the turning points in my life. I knew that it would not be easy and it has never been. Although now I am blessed to be married to a wonderful man that adopted my son when he was a little boy.
We ended up in a program for teen moms and I worked, went to school and raised this beautiful child that God gave to me. I had lots to learn I didn't come from a home where things were "normal".
I still have lots to learn but I know that despite how hard it has been I would never change I thing. That's enough for today I will try to continue this later but now I am off to make birthday pancakes!!
Happy Birthday Zack!

shocked!

I am shocked that godsown choose me to recieve a blog award. I haven't been blogging very long (I still prefer journaling Shhhhh)so I don't really think to much about others reading my blog. This is also my first blog award. The more time I spend blogging to more I become addicted which leads me to the rules ;-)


Two rules accompany this award:

1. Confess 5 things you are addicted to.
2. Pass the award on to 5 deserving bloggers.

Five addictions: (in totally random order!!)


1.Bible study, with little ones it has been hard to make it to church every week so I am loving both Bible studies I am in. My dh can stay with the kids and I can enjoy drawing closer to God and having fellowship with other believers.
2. my husband having him gone so much over the past months has reminded me that I am really addicted to him reading!!!
3. I read 2-3 books a week plus my Bible and numerous blogs
4. my kids I am addicted to spending time with them, finding great ideas for them, teaching them about Jesus, reading to them, exploring life with them and just loving on them!!!
5. taking pictures some many wonderful memories to preserve

so now I am suppose to pick 5 bloggers! Not an easy task!

Five deserving bloggers:
1. Cristine at Journeying Forward. One of the few bloggers that I know in really life and one of the reasons that I felt lead to start blogging. She has encouraged me in ways that she may never know!


2. Sharon B. at Quiet Reflections. Many time her words have been just what I needed. Recently I was having a bad attitude about serving my family (it can get a little crazy here and no one was doing their jobs ;-)) and I read her blog about Dying to Self. Lets just say it was just what I needed to be reminded of my own need to die to self.

3. Angie at Bring the Rain! Angie is amazing she has been through a lot but she trusts in God thru it all. On nights when I have struggled with the pain of my past I have been blessed by reading her blog. I often find myself moved to tears but I am always reminded how Great our God is.

4. Sonya from Truth 4the Journey I try ever week to join her for Thankful Thursday. I need to be reminded to be thankful. She always has a wonderful list of things she is thankful for.

5. See Saw Faith at Focused on the Center I love her description of herself "I am silly, serious, confusing, confused, illogical, creative, messy, emotional and blessed beyond all measure." That alone is enough to make me want to read her blog because I can totally relate!!!


If you have received the award already, then just accept it as confirmation of your blogs impact.